The Jackson 4

ruthjackson — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 13:17:36 +0000

Ok so Lauren got up…but then went back to bed…I love Saturday mornings!! So…I did something very meaningful…checked out facebook, I rarely ever go there anymore…just no time and it has a way of sucking me in and taking too much time. But today…I had an interesting message…maybe a possible trip to Romania involved…Interesting! I have friends who are over helping out at an orphanage in Romania right now on a two year mission trip. I’m helping to sponsor them along with many others…Lynsey and Spencer Ball. I had run into Lynsey out at family camp the summer before they left to go to Romania and expressed then how much I really wanted to take my kids on a missions trip to an orphanage. So…we talked about the possibilities then…no definite plans, kind of on the back burner…but she just left a message and said they are lining up teams to come over starting in May 2010 and throughout the summer. She wondered if I was still interested…hmmm…I’m not sure. I’ve been busy about making other plans and am definitely still planning to go to Israel…But I have to admit this morning I’m just staying open, who knows what might happen. Something to pray about for sure…Would love for my kids to have the experience, especially Lydia.

O.k. I’m getting off the computer now…time for some real life,

Ruth

ruthjackson — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 12:52:37 +0000

It’s Saturday morning, nice and peaceful. I’m not in a hurry to get around, kids are still in bed. I’ve taken the next dose of several medicines to try and combat my increasing symptoms…and it feels good to be home. I need to do some housework today, actually I wouldn’t mind being home all day long but I know at some point we’ll make the trip to Six Flags. My reward…a concert with Jeremy Camp which I know will be worth the effort.

Last night we went out to Debbie Batton’s cabin and watched Pollyanna with her it was a wonderful way to spend a Friday evening. She had even made up little tickets that said “popcorn”, “Drink”, “Candy” etc. on them so that the kids could turn in a ticket for each of the wonderful things she had all prepared for them. In her little cabin we enjoyed the sun setting, a movie that focused on being glad no matter what comes your way, and wonderful snacks made better by being in the presence of someone who loves us. Debbie is one of the most grace filled persons I know. And my kids always feel that in her presence, they are free to be themselves, in fact she actually wants them to be theirselves, spills and all. And I love watching her and Mike (her husband), I’m not sure I’ve ever seen aÂ couple that loves each other more, it’s a beautiful thing. I know Debbie would want me to insert here…that all of the above is only by the grace of God. And that’s just the thing, they’ve chosen to live there lives based on the truth of bringing honor and glory to God…and it shows. Lauren could’ve gone to a dance at school…but can I honestly tell you she had more fun watching a movie that was made over forty years ago and hanging out with us in Debbie’s cabin then she would’ve at the dance. Lauren is growing weary of all of the drama that goes on at the middle school.

Well…Lauren just woke up so I better see what I can find in my cupboards…they’re a little bare at the moment…something I need to take care of this weekend. Lauren did get her new glasses yesterday so that’s something special, she doesn’t want me to describe them on the blog…top secret…so when you see her you might notice they’re unique in a whole new way, and look really good on her.

Hope your Saturday is wonderful!

Love,

Ruth

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ruthjackson — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 16:53:06 +0000

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ruthjackson — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 11:58:44 +0000

Allergies always give me a run for my money when they come knocking and this time is definitely no different than the past. Yesterday I took medicine during the day to try and help and by the grace of God I made it through the day. By 5pm after grabbing a $5 pizza for my kids for dinner I was in bed, and I told the girls…if I’m not up by bedtime, just tuck each other in. The way I was feeling I thought I might very well sleep through the night. I did eventually get up…:).

Anyway, all that to say I’m so glad today is Friday. My friday’s are lighter days for me…I have a prep time at my elementary school which is nice, and my choir assistant teacher leads on Fridays, Yeah!! I think we’re still headed out to Mike and Debbie Batton’s house this evening for a girls night…we’re going to watch the movie Pollyanna with Debbie. She heard my girls had never seen the movie and decided it was necessary for their development as females:).

Then tomorrow it’s back out to Six Flags to see Jeremy Camp. I doubt we’ll go out in the morning…probably just go out after lunch. I know that sounds like an exhausting day and adults generally groan about six flags but truthfully my girls are at the age where it’s a fairly relaxing day. I take a book, ride an occasional ride and otherwise they ride rides together and I hang out on a bench. It works for us.

If you were going to sum up your life focus in one sentence…how would you sum it up. That was one of the questions from my small group on Wednesday night…interesting to think about it, especially if we’re being honest with each other, I mean I know we all know what we’re supposed to say but in reality what is my life focus in one sentence…

By the way…Lydia did finish her five books on a topic to be an “expert” in her classroom. Her topic was immigration and it was actually very interesting to read about Japanese, Irish, Polish, and Jewish immigrants to the USA. Her next topic she’s covering to be an “expert” is the Holocaust. She gets to choose her topics so I know that sounds heavy and you might wonder why a 10 year old girl would want to read about it…but Lydia loves history and it touches a deep place in her to read about the things that happened in world war II.

Hope you have a great friday!

Love,

Ruth

(Last night I dreamed that I was going to Israel…but I had never arranged the flight before the day the trip started so I was in a panic trying to get it arranged…should be exciting to see what kind of dreams I have about this trip in the coming months as it gets closer:)

ruthjackson — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 02:34:25 +0000

I do believe that my allergies have kicked in. Maybe because I turned off the air and have opened windows…I’m not sure. Lauren has been having allergy problems since last Saturday, I was hoping with vitamins and half way decent sleep I would be safe…Not so…so again I’m at the point of being in the lovely profession of being a music teacher who uses her voice all day long and obviously that will probably be difficult tomorrow…something to look forward to already…guess I’ll have to try some hot tea.

Tonight I tried out a small group…more out of convenience than anything else. It’s across the street from Lauren’s youth group time and so rather than drive home and return to pick up Lauren I figured I would kill two birds with one stone…boy don’t I sound lovely about the whole thing. Actually…I’ve been friends with Rick and Kim Bohn for a long time now and so it was easy to go…it’s very different from any home group I’ve ever been a part of…but who knows…it seems to be where I am to be at least for now. I figured I had put the whole thing of joining a home group off for long enough…gives me opportunity to get to know some people that I wouldn’t otherwise so I look forward to that.

Well…the merry go round is winding down for another day…only to be all cranked up to go in a few short hours. Lauren had a good drum lesson tonight and tomorrow Lydia has violen, they both seem to be doing well in voice…I’m thankful my kids have opportunity to develop some of the talents God has given them. The weekend’s just around the corner….woohoo!!

Love,

Ruth

ruthjackson — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 10:59:16 +0000

I woke up in the night with the verse about life being just a vapor, a blowing in the wind in my mind. It seems like day after day go by in fast succession…the next thing you know another week has gone by, we’re back in church, the next thing you know season after season have gone by, holiday after holiday, year after year. At times it seems like we’re just on an endless merry go round ride, seeing the same sights everyday but never really moving anywhere. I’m reminded of the song “stop the world…I want to get off”…I can’t remember who it’s by, if Mark was here…wellÂ he would have that covered:).

So…it’s dark out and again I’m showered and getting ready for another day, waking up my daughter who is trying to soak in every last possible moment in bed. I’m thinking through what in the world I’m doing with my kids today at school…it’s all somewhere in my mind but I have to kind of resort through my plans in my mind everyday before I go in. I don’t teach with a paper in front of me, an outline…I just jump in and try to move from one thing to the next with very little down time between, the main secret I’ve learned is to keep the music moving from the start to the finish of the class. It can’t stay on one focus, song or activity for very long but I’ve kind of become or am becoming a master of weaving one activity to another, one song to another, etc. That’s the secret of being an elementary music teacher…a secret that can be very exhausting. I often wonder how long I’ll do this job…I’m literally on my feet all day long. You would think it would be a good work out plan, that I’d be in shape…my body doesn’t seem to go along with that plan. I’m committed for another seven years…beyond that I don’t know. I want to be in the school system at least long enough to get my own two kids through high school. I’m curious to see if God might stop the ride after that, or at least give me a different merry go round so I can catch a different view:).

Here goes another trip around…

Ruth

ruthjackson — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 22:04:56 +0000

I’m happy to say we’ve almost made it through another day:). Today it looked like it might rain so I went classroom to classroom rather than setting up outside…was able to make it work. And everything else at school went fine. Had a good lunch time with Lori, I always enjoy our visits. It’s good to have friends.

Lydia had her voice lesson tonight and just finished up practicing her violen. Lauren is doing her pile of homework as I type and then will work on her quizzing and voice. I had at one time thought about signing up the girls for swimming this fall…the exercise would’ve been great…but we just don’t have time. They are both taking voice and their instrument lessons, that along with homework and quizzing its about all we can manage.

Tonight I need to post grades for progress reports. And then I’m making up handbell charts, because after we’re done drumming we’re switching to handbells…much easier to transport:). And then I start with K-3 preparing for Christmas programs. Part of me is really dreading starting Christmas music…sometimes I feel like I’m burned out of Christmas before December even gets here. THe nature of my job I guess.

Anyway…nothing huge going on otherwise. I continue to read books about the Holy Land, learning more and more about the geography of the bible, and am finding that it is changing some of my perspectives tremendously. We don’t realize how much our picture of the world and the land colors what we read…

Hope your day was great!

Ruth

ruthjackson — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 22:33:49 +0000

Monday’s are hard but we made it through so that’s always a good feeling:). It was another day of drums outside for me, I have to be grateful, we haven’t had rain in forever…and my first class or two each day are divine…it’s just the last three or four that put me in a bit of heatstroke, but it’s working out fine. Today the kids in choir were a little more talkative than usual, I can tell we’ve hit the comfort zone when they’re feeling real comfortable at school and it’s easy for things to get out of whack…it’s a constant effort trying to keep the ship afloat…but they are a good bunch of kids so…I’ll keep working at it. Plus I could really use the pay check too:).

Just got done watering all of my flowers, it’s amazing to me how much I enjoy that process in the spring and even into the summer but by fall…well I can’t bear to let the flowers die so…I keep watering, but I have to admit the excitement has passed to some degree, I guess I’m just preparing myself for the reality of what’s coming ahead. And truthfully by the time I get home from school I’m ready to collapse, especially after dinner, homework, practice music lessons, wash dishes, do some school work, etc.

Last night we had a great baptism service at our church. I was so excited to see two of my fellow Alton Public School teachers get baptized…I love it when I see other adults at my school taking a stand for Christ in a secular setting. And one of the people who got baptized is our union president and is very recognized in our district…I’m thrilled that she is publicly putting her faith out there…can’t wait to see what God will do with that!

Lauren’s not feeling to swell today, in fact she really didn’t want to go to school…just too much activity over the weekend…ah the teenage years are just about here…all good stuff but we’re going to have to do a better job of weeding out what is best vs. what is good. I think the afternoon for her would have done her much better yesterday if she had come home and taken a nap over going to the zoo. She had fun…but has paid for it ever since. It will be an early to bed tonight.

Seems nice to be home, I love these evening hours at home, it’s still daylight, the chores are pretty much finished…and now it’s time to relax a little. Hope you’re having a great evening at home too!

Love,

Ruth

ruthjackson — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 20:59:42 +0000

I’ve thought a lot about the whole walking on water thing with Jesus lately. Being called by Jesus, stepping out in faith, not looking around but rather keeping my eyes on Jesus, dealing with some boat envy in my life, etc. This morning Lydia and I had a rough morning, actually as of late she’s been going through some normal but need to be addressed moments of selfishness…habits that have formed in how she treats Lauren, words that she says etc. Lydia is a beautiful kind child, compassionate for those less fortunate, etc. when God is at her center. But lately due to possibly lack of sleep, more time with friends, having no father, her age, or whatever other reason there might be she’s been pushing the boundaries. I’m a firm person, a firm teacher and mom, I’m highly relational…believe that at the core if we have a deep relationship than behavior will fall in line for the most part without me having to scream and yell etc. I try to give respect and therefore receive respect. But this morning I was incredibly aware that Lydia is needing to have for a lack of better words her chain yanked. Everyonce inawhile as a child we have to understand who is in charge and if words and respect don’t do it…than harsh consequences may be the answer. Mark excelled in this area…I probably not so much. So this morning I wasn’t sure if LYdia was going to go to church with us or not…I already knew the zoo trip with the youth was out this afternoon…which was fine by me, it was too much for us anyway. On the way to church which was somewhat surreal as you all know if you’ve had a rough morning at home I turned on WIBI, our local Christian radio station and for whatever reason they were talking about walking on water…up til that point I had spent time crying out to God for Him to save me and than frankly I had a few moments where I felt…don’t bother saving me…just let me go down, a feeling of surrender but not out of choice more out of being beat down and deciding I give up. But on the radio this morning the main emphasis was the words “Do not fear, I am with you”. I had never really thought of that statement with that story before but I have to admit I knew the words were for me. We went on to church, I turned on my as normal as possible look, makes me wonder how many other people were doing the same. I answered the question “How are you” with the appropriate answer. Until…Pastor Mark came up to me and said How are you…he is such a genuine man and I was feeling so raw that as much as I wanted to just say good…I couldn’t…I told him, my daughter needs her dad, she needs the kind of strength and firmness that only a dad can give, or at least her dad did, my redhead is strong willed, stubborn, and was a daddy’s girl…and I said she needs her dad. I’m so thankful to go to a church where Pastor Mark didn’t rush off…but looked me in the eye with care and concern and I have a feeling that Lydia will be prayed for this week, possibly me too:).

In my sunday school class which I know I’m going to love this year, we’re talking about the land of Israel, ironic as I’ve been reading so much about it lately…today we talked about Abraham and the promise he was given that he would be blessed and have many descendants, etc. I guess I hadn’t realized how many years went by between the time when he was first given that promise and to when he finally had Isaac. It was a long time. And yet he believed and kept hope alive. I was reminded that God gives each of us a promise. We don’t know why God chose Abraham exactly, I’m sure he wasn’t the only righteous man at theÂ time, in the same way I’m not sure why He chose me for the promise He gave me. But today I realized I needed to be reminded of the promise, and in a strange way I had already been by WIBI on the way to church. During church, I didn’t sing a song, which is unusual for me…because it hit me in waves. God has given me a promise, and His promise is tailored uniquely for me, and it is my job to live by the promise regardless of how I feel or what I see. His promise to me is simply “I will never leave you or forsake you.”I rememberÂ almost 3 years ago hearing that promise clearly…and truthfully maybeÂ He had been saying it to me even before then.Â I began to think about each word individually during church…the “I” God’s not talking about a substitute, not my family, church or close friends, no He is saying that He himself is taking care of this job. The “Will” I began to realize that is an active choice whether I will or will not do something and God is telling me that He himself has made a choice and will follow through on it. The word “Never”….I love how there are no loopholes, nothing I can do to screw it up, God doesn’t have bad days or change…He himself chooses to never…”leave” that word brings to mind the many times I’ve had to say goodbye to someone. I’m one of those people who goodbyes tear up, I will never have to say goodbye to God, and he will never say goodbye to me…he will never choose to walk away from me, I will never be abandoned. The word “you” it’s the only word that is repeated in the verse, my promise from God…and I find that special…He’s not saying it in a general kind of way to the masses…He’s telling me, Ruth Ann Jackson, that He is a personal God who is aware of my life, my hopes, dreams, frustrations, etc. and He doesn’t stop there…because then He says the word “Or”…I love that, He’s not done…there’s more to the promise, not only will He stay with me always…but He is actually for me…he will never “forsake” me…He’s on my team, with me, not just in presence but actually pulling for me. And then the repeated word of “you”…just to reiterate that He’s talking to me. As I sat in church today thinking this through I realized that just as Abraham was given a promise so have I been given one. And I need to live in the light of that promise. I sense strongly that I am to be about listening for, noticing, being aware of God’s presence in my life and that in everything I face whether it’s parenting, teaching, homemaking, etc. He is pulling with me…I am not alone.

The whole morning went from me feeling like I was sinking and saying…fine just let me go down, I give up…to walking with Jesus and sensing that all of those holes I often feel, He Himself is filing those holes, even if I don’t see it. It bolstered my faith today to know that He will never leave me or forsake me. In fact I almost wanted to stand in church and share…but the praise time had already gone by:)…and I didn’t want to make a fool of myself.

So…Lydia and I came home and took a nap…we bothÂ needed it. and we had opportunity to talk about how each one of us is messed up…we are all ugly inside, selfish, prideful, people and nothing without God. We talked about how we all need God, we talked about God’s grace. And I talked with her about the fact that even though she expressed some sorrow…there were still consequences to be paid and she will be paying them for a little while…

Another interesting discussion came up…she didn’t want to be prayed for…it upset her that Lauren had asked for prayer for her sister in sunday school class…she was embarrassed…which led to an interesting discussion about the fact that we all need prayer, every one of us. I mean I know in prayer time we don’t all speak up and ask for it…but we all need prayer, just because we admit it doesn’t mean we’re a terrible person, in fact it could very well be the opposite, maybe we’re honest enough with ourselves to stop pretending and to get real before a Holy God.

Tonight is a baptism service at our church followed up by quizzing. Then off to another week.

What has God promised to you…I have a feeling it’s unique for all of us, and He may have spoken it many years ago…sometimes we need a reminder, new perspective on it. Whatever it is I think that He has an amazing way of summing up everything we need in one or two sentences. I’m not promised another marriage, I’m not promised early retirement, I’m not promised really anything more than His presence, and that He is on my team. And in the end that is enough.

When I die…I hope one of the themes that is talked about whether it’s in people standing around talking about me, or the actual service…is the fact that in Ruth’s life God was enough.

(My sister in law Amy is back in the hospital not doing very well…please pray for her)

Love,

Ruth

ruthjackson — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 16:39:31 +0000

Back in 1992 I sold Cutco knives for a summer job. It was a terrible job for me simply because I’m not a sales person but Mark went with me on just about every call and amazingly we ended up between the two of us selling enough knives to at least make something…not much mind you:). Anyway…as a result when we got married we didn’t have much, all hand me down furniture, etc. but we had a great set of knives. Last night…I used the French Chef Knife for the first time…it was kind of comical really. I mean it only took me 17 years to decide to break it in. I’ve been quite the chef this weekend. O.k. I know most of you probably cook on a daily basis so I’m saying I’ve been quite a chef for me and my normal level of cooking. My potato salad turned out alright. I’m not convinced it’s as good as my mom’s but if she was here she would know how to taste it and add a little pinch of something to make it better…I’m not that good I stick to the recipe. I ended up buying baked beans that were actually already seasoned with everything so I could’ve just open the cans warmed it up and said good enough…but I decided to put a little more into it and actually follow a recipe so I spent the morning mixing mustard, barbeque sauce, vinegar, ketchup, etc. it was really kind of fun and I have to say I’m pleased with the result…I tasted them already and they pass:). I also made myself some more fresh squeezed lemonade…I’m addicted I have to admit.

I’ve been kind of pacing myself today. Not doing my normal Saturday clean through the house, I’m sure I’ll do some pick up…but I could tell that I needed a day off. I actually went back to bed after picking Lauren up at 5:40am this morning…she’s still sleeping at present, seemed to have a good time. Last night she and I went and saw “All about Steve” at the movies…it had a few questionable scenes as all movies seem to have…but overall it was a hillarious movie and just what I needed, something light and funny. I enjoy most movies that Sandra Bullock is in. I’m really looking forward to her movie coming out in NOvember called “The Blind Side”.

Anyway…I’m thinking about opening the windows, turning the air off and soaking in some fresh air…I’m debating whether the allergies that might ensue are worth it…but I think so:). Hope your day is great! I’m looking forward to hanging out with friends tonight and being outside, good food, good friends, and some time off from my life.

So…if you have a kitchen utensil you haven’t used for 17 years…I challenge you to use it…you might be surprised how fun it is:).

Ruth